So this time next week I will have had my presubmission review, an external assessment of my progress in my PhD to determine whether or not I am indeed ready to "write up" and submit my thesis instead of laboring in the lab indefinitely. My supervisor said this can happen to more senior students because it is tempting for supervisors to ask them to do more and more....he himself would have graduated a year earlier if this external review was in place during his PhD. He then admitted that as my supervisor, he too would love for me to do my PhD forever....
Awww!!!--But no thanks.
University of Queensland has a very good resource on FAQs for PhD students (which sadly Monash seems to lack) Some gems I thought were :
"Almost everyone who has finished a PhD would say that it was only when they had finished that they really saw how it should have been done."
and
"Story of a Thesis
Once upon a time researchers believed that …………………….. (literature review).
But then I thought that maybe ……………………… (aims),
so, what I did was ………………………………………… (method),
and I've discovered that …………………………. (findings),
which changed the way we …………………. (contribution to knowledge)." http://www.uq.edu.au/student-services/phdwriting/fr_phfaq.html
So as I am closing on that finish line, i.e. I can hear some cheering in the distance but can't actually make sight of the ribbon yet, I am starting to convince myself that the race that I have been half hobbling half running is starting to make some sense.
But at the same time, because I have been running for awhile and may have reached some cognitively impaired state due to oxygen deprivation, it is hard to be sure that things are actually starting to make sense and not just a last bit of hallucinatory euphoria before I pass out and pee in my pants.
Is this going to be decent contribution to biomedical research?
Can I get some decent papers out of this?
Is there hope for translation into serving the "unmet needs" that we talk about as part of every background spiel?
Or am I really just squinting hard to see lines that aren't really there?
I really don't know for sure. But I think the review will give some indication at least.
I have been saying to most people who comment that I am finishing "early" (which isn't true, I am only aiming to submit on time, but most people extend the dreaded submission date by at least by half a year) that I have merely accepted "it's not going to be a great thesis" and dragging it longer would not magically make the project any better than it is. Mostly because after this it is just me and my homes Omar again, and he does not like my laptop very much. Or rather he likes my laptop too much which means me trying to work turns quickly into me trying to stop him from banging on the keys as I am typing.
That said, a tiny voice inside my head still occasionally whines over the idea that it is not going to be a great thesis. A subsequent purring voice then tries to delude me into thinking it might still be pretty good. Realistically, I can only aim for good enough. And as many people try to console me, at the end of the day all it is, is a Pass or Fail. And failures are well and truly rare. The examiners will provide comments though and poor comments is almost as bad as a fail. I can say that insyaAllah I will pass. But I am not sure how I will handle my thesis getting shredded to bits by the merciless tyrant that is "the academic".
Having had some opportunity peer review for journals myself, I know now that "the academic" creeps up to even the nicest mellowest of reviewers (ahem, speaking of myself). I always like to think I am or try to be fair, and I am quite sure I have at least not made any personal comments about anyone's writing. But really, sometimes the temptation is there when one reads certain bodies of work. And the thing is if the roles were reversed, it would be the same situation. The oh so obvious mistake of an unqualified statement that a reviewer would pounce on is the very same statement that the author probably spent months rewriting trying to get right. The uppance comes to us all!!
I only hope my own sense of "fairness" will be met with equal "fairness" from my potential examiners. And dare I hope further, I might pull something out of the bag during the final moments of writing up that warrants some commendations!
Aha! I guess the air has really gotten thin in here.
Because this is all assuming that my review panel even thinks I have sufficient data to write up.
Well, wish me luck!
Awww!!!--But no thanks.
University of Queensland has a very good resource on FAQs for PhD students (which sadly Monash seems to lack) Some gems I thought were :
"Almost everyone who has finished a PhD would say that it was only when they had finished that they really saw how it should have been done."
and
"Story of a Thesis
Once upon a time researchers believed that …………………….. (literature review).
But then I thought that maybe ……………………… (aims),
so, what I did was ………………………………………… (method),
and I've discovered that …………………………. (findings),
which changed the way we …………………. (contribution to knowledge)." http://www.uq.edu.au/student-services/phdwriting/fr_phfaq.html
So as I am closing on that finish line, i.e. I can hear some cheering in the distance but can't actually make sight of the ribbon yet, I am starting to convince myself that the race that I have been half hobbling half running is starting to make some sense.
But at the same time, because I have been running for awhile and may have reached some cognitively impaired state due to oxygen deprivation, it is hard to be sure that things are actually starting to make sense and not just a last bit of hallucinatory euphoria before I pass out and pee in my pants.
Is this going to be decent contribution to biomedical research?
Can I get some decent papers out of this?
Is there hope for translation into serving the "unmet needs" that we talk about as part of every background spiel?
Or am I really just squinting hard to see lines that aren't really there?
I really don't know for sure. But I think the review will give some indication at least.
I have been saying to most people who comment that I am finishing "early" (which isn't true, I am only aiming to submit on time, but most people extend the dreaded submission date by at least by half a year) that I have merely accepted "it's not going to be a great thesis" and dragging it longer would not magically make the project any better than it is. Mostly because after this it is just me and my homes Omar again, and he does not like my laptop very much. Or rather he likes my laptop too much which means me trying to work turns quickly into me trying to stop him from banging on the keys as I am typing.
That said, a tiny voice inside my head still occasionally whines over the idea that it is not going to be a great thesis. A subsequent purring voice then tries to delude me into thinking it might still be pretty good. Realistically, I can only aim for good enough. And as many people try to console me, at the end of the day all it is, is a Pass or Fail. And failures are well and truly rare. The examiners will provide comments though and poor comments is almost as bad as a fail. I can say that insyaAllah I will pass. But I am not sure how I will handle my thesis getting shredded to bits by the merciless tyrant that is "the academic".
Having had some opportunity peer review for journals myself, I know now that "the academic" creeps up to even the nicest mellowest of reviewers (ahem, speaking of myself). I always like to think I am or try to be fair, and I am quite sure I have at least not made any personal comments about anyone's writing. But really, sometimes the temptation is there when one reads certain bodies of work. And the thing is if the roles were reversed, it would be the same situation. The oh so obvious mistake of an unqualified statement that a reviewer would pounce on is the very same statement that the author probably spent months rewriting trying to get right. The uppance comes to us all!!
I only hope my own sense of "fairness" will be met with equal "fairness" from my potential examiners. And dare I hope further, I might pull something out of the bag during the final moments of writing up that warrants some commendations!
Aha! I guess the air has really gotten thin in here.
Because this is all assuming that my review panel even thinks I have sufficient data to write up.
Well, wish me luck!
 |
| "Imma ace dis prezentashuns", says the brave Mr. Gorilla. (In real life, he goes to a log and pees a stream fit to refill the Nile) |
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